Such a Lovely Start to the New Year

Migraines suck. Particularly the part where I feel like stabbing myself in the forehead.

Anyhow, it's been quiet around here. Which is both extremely nice, and slightly sad. It's never fun when you don't feel productive, but I just keep reminding myself that this nothing time will disappear when I have to go back to Verm, so I'm taking advantage of it.

I don't like roller coasters. This migraine is kinda like a roller coaster, where I'm good for a time, then I have to curl up on the couch and just press my forehead against something hard. The roller coaster thing is back again with HCB. It's just so damn difficult between all of the good signs and the not-so-good signs. I also hate grabbing at straws, and I feel like the overanalyzing is going to put me over the edge. I've got everyone from all directions telling me that there are good signs. Sures is telling me not to doubt myself, my neighbor telling me that there's good chances....and for some reason these are the two that I trust the most. Sures is a good mutual friend, and my neighbor Aaron...well, Aaron's basically the slightly older (and married) version of HCB. If anyone knows the way HCB thinks, it would very likely be Aaron. So when he says that if HCB was willing to go for lunch when he's feeling like crap, then he'd be willing to go when he's feeling good...then I really should listen to him.

But it's still difficult as hell. I'm still afraid of competition that I can't stand up against. And it's nothing but a waiting game until HCB is back from break before I can even attempt to ask at another lunch.

I really, really hate waiting. :/

Like waiting for Psych season 4 and True Blood. Those would make the week go by faster, but noooo those haven't come yet. And still waiting for that coat to come back in stock so I can order it. Damnit.